I love people screaming at the top of their lungs

I love people screaming at the top of their lungs

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Fear Of Trees

This is the day that the storm moved in. It was calm when the clouds rolled over the meadows. I had no idea how horrible that night was going to be. This tree, like many others across the valley, was torn apart 12 hours later. Its limbs now lay at its base like tombstones. I [...]


The Old Underwood

Greetings Sir, This is a terrible letter… I have no story to turn in. I will not be apologizing to you, however, I will be apologizing to myself. To my future self. My future, midsize SUV owning, strip mall driving, boring, Starbucks shopping self. How many people do you think recognize the Moby Dick reference [...]


I Don’t Want To Write About You

“Why don’t you walk on down to Spirit Lake? You can walk over there on top of that snow.” Harry pointed out a field through the kitchen window that was buried about four feet deep in snow. “I will… oh sure… probably never to be seen again.” I smiled meekly at him. Harry grunted then [...]


Your Narrator

As one might sketch some ethereal writer, tucked into his twilit attic with journal in hand and candlestick lighting his page, I lie here before you now. The wide plank oak floor scratching against my belly stretches out to the window where my story lives. It is a warm night so I require no blanket. [...]


Fictional Quotes From Famous People

Elvis Presley: “I’m a mountain formed by pressure.” Lou Reed: “Music really isn’t that hard. You do your best to copy your favorite bands and then you fuck up and accidentally sound like yourself.” Roman Polanski: “It all comes back to Mia Farrow.” Dr. Seuss: “It’s a hard world that asks you to live with [...]


Listening to Van Morrison

The sound of Van Morrison sniffing in T.B Sheets always makes me laugh. But it isn’t very funny because the song is about some girl who stays up all night dying on her deathbed. Last year I went to Ireland with my girlfriend to meet her family. Her uncle works in the music industry and [...]


More goddam publicity

Avoiding boredom at work today, I impulsively purchased seymoursfatlady.com from GoDaddy for ten dollars. I’m wondering now what to do with it? Perhaps a photograph of Hulk Hogan or some livecam over an airport might be suitable…. The beauty is it could be anything really.